AAAAnnnd, just in case you’re not familiar with the lingo, here’s some verbiage from the homepage:



Between Real World & the outrageous Jersey Shore show that profiles Staten Island’s finest to the entire country in a light that has embarrassed Italian-Americans to no end, I didn’t think MTV could get much worse. Then I saw the preview for, and subsequently watched about 20 minutes of, Teen Mom, a show about being one, which my Facebook friends would later tell me was based on a UK show called “16 and Pregnant.”

First let me call something out: MTV is supposed to stand for “Music Television.” It no longer does, nor has it resembled such for years. That aside, I really can’t believe that they’d stoop so low as to create a reality TV drama documenting the lives of teenage girls with babies. Sure, there’s the “if you show the trials and tribulations of teenage motherhood, you’ll prevent others from making that mistake” argument, but let’s be honest, in order to keep it interesting, MTV has to glorify it a little bit, and their target demographic probably doesn’t gap into the whole “i shouldn’t do this” thing. Regardless, in the 20 minutes I watched, one of the girls goes to the doctor, baby in tow, to get birth control so she can keep having sex!!! I mean, hooray for safe sex but isn’t the first bundle of joy enough to keep you from risking another?

I tend to be pretty conservative in a lot of my views around the topic, but I don’t think I’m nuts here… people emulate what they see on TV, especially impressionable teenagers. Whether the intent of the show is to show teens the downside to teen pregnancy/parenthood or not, I’ve got to imagine that the opposite interpretation is just as likely whereby viewers say, “well if it’s okay for the girls who get to be on TV as a result, it’s okay for me too!”

I’ve also been tracking my daily intake through Livestrong.com, which acquired a nifty little site called Daily Plate, which I discovered years ago during one of my many unsuccessful dieting stages. It’s somewhat tedious to track everything you eat, and downright difficult when you’ve been bad and don’t want to admit it, but it keeps you honest and for the most part provides accurate nutritional information on just about any food product out there, as well as solid calorie-burning data for tons of exercises and activities. For instance, did you know that the average 145-pound person will burn 230 calories/hour saddling horses? Disappointingly enough, that same 145-pound person will only burn 52 calories/hour during (moderate) sex. And although vigorous sex burns nearly double that, sadly it’s still not as good for your weight loss goals as saddling horses…

• Was single
• Was 270 unhealthy pounds
• Was bored out of my mind and counted the days, hours, minutes to being laid off from a job I didn’t like or want
• Lived a pretty unhealthy lifestyle of partying, bad food, and irresponsible spending

Today I reflect on where I am now. In the last year, I have:

• Found a wonderful girlfriend whom I love very much
• Lost 35 pounds, slimming down to a post-college low of 233 (I gained some over the holidays . I plan to get to 200 by 2011
• Landed an exciting, challenging, fulfilling (albeit sometimes stressful) job at an internet company that’s poised to explode in 2010. Best part about it, I’m learning a ton from smart people who I genuinely like and have great respect for.
• Toned down my John Belushi party ways significantly, adopted a healthier eating and exercise regimen, and while my spending is still out of control, I plan to work on that in 2010 like I did on my weight in 2009.

Other highlights of the past year include:

• Getting laid off from my former employer in the 5th round of layoffs (at least I made it that far!)
• Traveling to England, Ireland, Scotland, France, and Italy on my “Unemployed World Tour”
• Fighting the negative feelings that creep into ones mind from waking up jobless each day and the challenge of looking in the mirror, telling yourself that it’s who you are that’s important, not what you do or how much money you make, and actually believing it. May I never forget that…
• Ignoring my ego and suppressing my pride by taking an internship 4 years out of college that enabled me to prove myself and turned into a spectacular opportunity.
• Listening to my heart over my head and developing a great relationship with a fabulous woman
• Finally getting a personal trainer after promising to do so for the last decade
• Becoming a full-fledged American Citizen and securing my 3rd passport (US, Canadian, Italian), thereby making me one step closer to being an international man of mystery like James Bond.
• Spending quality time with family, friends, and colleagues.

Resolutions for 2010 and beyond:

• Get to 199lbs for the first time since 2001
• Create budgets and actually abide by them
• Pay off all credit card debt
• Work smart, play smart
• Continue to nurture the positive relationships in my life
• Live each day a little further outside of my comfort zone, realizing that only then will I achieve true success as a person

I’d like to think I’m going to start blogging heavily again on here, but time is limited these days. Either way, I feel good about what’s transpired in the last year and never thought I’d do a 180 like I have. The best part, it all just kind of happened and seemed almost effortless. I’ve learned that achieving a lofty goal happens step-by-step, day-by-day, minute-by-minute, and that attitude is what I’m most proud of adopting this year.

Happy New Year!

So now they’ve got this really sexy device that looks like it was designed by Apple or some other manufacturer that isn’t Palm (reminds me of Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter! commercials, only I Can’t Believe It’s Not A Palm!), but they are running these TV ads that almost make my skin crawl – I’m not joking you! They’ve got this one commercial with this strange music that sounds like the intro to a cheesy 80s sitcom, or the kind of music your elementary school teacher used to pop in some outdated shitty VHS about something I can’t remember, or a crappy corporate america training video that HR plays in new hire orientation. Then, this pale, anemic looking redheaded woman who appears to be wearing a nightgown turns around and starts talking to me about street lights and going “bing, bing, bing” while she plays with her Pre and talks about how she’s having one of those days where life just “flows.” Woulda thought it was an ad for Always if she didn’t whip out her little clamshell phone. But seriously, she looks like a cross between McCauley Culkin and those freakish translucent robots from I, Robot with (Wiki-Wiki) Will Smith. See the video below.

See the resemblance? Crazy right? Then there’s the other commercial where Palm apparently hired the entire fleet of Chinese dudes who performed that freakishly mechanical number at the opening to the Beijing Olympic games that reminded everyone in the world that the Chinese are precise as hell and can collectively do some pretty mindblowing things. This is supposed to entice me to realize how the Pre can help me manage all the different people who “flow” in and out of my life seamlessly. I mean, I like this commercial better than the one where she’s looking at me – rather see a bunch of Chinese people proving displaying evidence that North America is going to someday be their bitch in the form of a dance routine than have this woman stare into my soul as if she thinks my heart is a Palm Pre and just wants to reach out and grab it. See that video here:

So what do you think? Is it just me? or are these supernatural, peaceful, magical “flow” commercials actually a job well done by Palm? Here’s CNet’s video review of the phone – something “useful” for you in this blog of random ramblings

http://reviews.cnet.com/smartphones/palm

One of the reasons that I’m not particularly religious is because I’m still a brazen young guy who hasn’t been tested with really devastating challenges that result in me losing hope in things. I’m confident/arrogant enough to believe that as Marley said, “every little ting…ees gonna be alright, mon.” But another reason is because the Catholic church tends to be so somber and it’s all about feeling shame and apologizing for everything you do so that you are guaranteed better a good seat inside the pearly gates. At mass, people drone on and on with the prayers, and the priest will preach and pontificate to the disciples who hang their head in shame. Personally, I like the way the Baptists do it – celebrate Jesus and God by dancing around, singing your ass off, and actually CELEBRATING.

This all came to mind for me when I saw the video below. I’ve been to a few weddings this summer and this reminded me just how blah the Catholic church is – even at joyous occasions like weddings, there’s a somber tone to it. Check out this video from a wedding in Minnesota that truly represents the joy that is supposed to be a wedding day. I want you to pay attention to the halfway point…you’ll notice that you’re smiling pretty much throughout the whole thing – it made my day yesterday. And for those of you who know me, pay attention to the 1:09 and 2:50 minute mark…I think my doppelganger is in Minneapolis.

Wasn’t that just about the happiest video you’ve ever seen? Sheer, unadulterated joy. The way a wedding SHOULD be.